Living in Kolkata has always been enriching and interesting for me....I love this city with all my heart and love my day-to-day living in here. And because I have lived mostly alone in this all-accomodating 'City of Joy' right from the start, I still love it like that....nevertheless I feel lonely at times in this buzz. In a movie I watched recently...it was said that the condition of 'living alone' is overrated, it's not that beautiful and sought after thing all the time. Even for me, who believes 'Solitude is Bliss', this rings true sometimes....seated in an almost empty bus speeding through the EM Bypass in the evening, or walking down a crowded street in a busy summer afternoon -- I longed for the presence of a valued friend by my side....sometimes...not always. The feeling of loneliness does not depress me though...nonetheless tears well up from nowhere in my eyes.
Again at times, I become the self-centred woman for whom the company of self becomes the only and most extremely valued thing of life....then I love to go watch a movie all alone on a lazy Sunday morning or in a rainy afternoon....trust me a good movie while it's raining outside is one of the many things to be thankful for in life...whatever....at these moments again, I need no one .
My life thus, like often the most of the world, oscillates between contentments and cravings, wishes and abandonments, desires and fulfillment.

Everyday in our lives....we come across a new realisation....often that goes in our favour, sometimes not so....I, at present, am living in a state where I have the option to not put up with this (as it is difficult sometimes) and flee....but difficult times are again a challenge....to bear something which I could easily have chosen not to and settled for something less but comfortable. I thus realise that everything in this world does not always go by one's choices....or more accurately, our own choices does not always add up to our conveniences, the latter being more true for me at the moment...

Jotting down something I believe..

1. The Kite-Runner and We The Living are the best books I've ever read..till now
2. There is something very wrong about how I pursue my goals, otherwise a dreamer like me would have been an achiever of that might as well.
3. Kolkata is the city where I actually grew up ( factually Durgapur remains, though)
4. Life's profound changes occur, or atleast begin to occur for that matter...within moments
5. I love reading poetry...although most of the time, I cannot understand them in full measure..
6. The most difficult emotion ever faced is to talk 'bout someone who's no more and whom I really really loved....
7. I rate heart more to head, actions to words, dreams to reality, instincts to planning
8. At times people find me as an open book written in some weird, foreign language
9.The best and worst memories of my life are those of my PCGH (Presidency College Girls' Hostel) days.
10. Nobody believed in me except my family and some of my school teachers....and hardly a friend or two....